Trash Cans

Dear Trash Guy,
On a scale of 1-10, how difficult is it for you to place the trash can that you emptied into your truck in an upright position on the sidewalk where you found it? Why do you have to throw it in the middle of the street or on my front yard? Why is my trash can lid in my neighbor's pool? The recycling guy seems to be able to put the recycle boxes back just fine.

It's not like the person at my work who comes around at night to empty the daily trash just chucks the bins in the middle of cubes and hallways after emptying them.

Please consider.

Thanks

Band-Aids

Band-Aids will always be important as long as there are kids in the world.  Everyone always had cuts when they're kids. Are kids’ skin just extra sensitive or are they that much more active than adults? Or are kids just idiots? Every week I had a cut on my shin, or my knees had raspberries on them. What was I doing? Was I just sliding on pavement for fun? Was I playing jump rope with thorn branches?

So kids get band-aids, they're on for a week and they get all dusty and dirty around the edges and then right before the cut healed, the band-aid falls off into a pool and the cut re-opens. Repeat that dusty and dirty around the edges step with a new band-aid and pray you don't go to a pool party in the next week.

I'm not sure why, but I never had Band-Aids at my house. Maybe because Band-Aids are the most racist product of all time?